Sunday.

It seems to me like it all changed on Saturday night. It was the end of a week of sun and happiness; of times that I'll never forget simply because they were bathed in warm light. Then it was time for work, back to the daily grind.

"We need to rage through this life. "

As soon as Saturday was over, it was clear that things were final, as the clouds closed, heavy on the endless blue that had extended above us before.

So it's time to close it and wait for the next portal to happiness.

I'm trying to stop associating songs, films, books, pictures, ideas, memories and words with things I don't like to remember, and I'm attempting to educate myself out of this habit simply by listening to/looking at (etc...) these things until their original neutrality is regained.

As Coleridge basically said in The Nightingale, we shouldn't transpose our own (melancholy) meanings onto the things that nature (and, i suppose, general life) has given us in good faith. No nightingale comes into the world believing its song is infinitely sad, just as no song comes with a pre-packaged memory you should attach to it. Nick Hornby, a more modern voice on the subject asks:

"What came first, the music or the misery? People worry about kids playing with guns, or watching violent videos, that some sort of culture of violence will take them over. Nobody worries about kids listening to thousands, literally thousands of songs about heartbreak, rejection, pain, misery and loss. Did I listen to pop music because I was miserable? Or was I miserable because I listened to pop music?" (Well, John Cusack said it, but Nick Hornby thought it)

Just because I listened to it then doesn't mean I can't love it again, now. Having said that, I'm not sure that I will ever completely lose this flaw in my personality. I take things and make them apply to me, and that's the way it is. (It's like that...)

"If there's one thing I can never confess, it's that I can't dance a single step. It's you. It's me. And it's dancing."

New songs make it all the better.

Sq.